Friday, August 13, 2010
Things I taught my children
Found here
In my on going, and usually monumentally unsuccessful, attempt at getting organize,
I was sorting through an archaic stack when I came upon an old steno notebook
that I had been writing in back when my children were in elementary school. I
remember at the time I had decided to jot down the wit and wisdom I had taught
my children. These weren't rules written on a board somewhere, but the casual
lessons taught on an on going basis. Some might seem self evident…but one thing
I learned very early on in parenting was…ASSUME NOTHING! The following is a
list that I threw together that evening. Now, I find the list to be both
amusing and nostalgic. Although not exhaustive, and there were certainly more
things added to the list as the children got older, these got them through the
first decade of their life! These were written in no particular order...just as
they popped into my head!
1. Spend some part of every day outside.
2. Don’t watch television on school days.
3. Do your homework before you go to bed.
4. Don’t swear.
5. Don’t tell dirty jokes.
6. Keep change in your pockets at Christmas to throw in the Salvation Army
Buckets.
7. Make a point of reading biographies.
8. Never share an important secret with someone who says, “You can trust
me.”
9. Smile a lot!
10. Ask the new kid at school to eat lunch with you and your friends.
11. Don’t tattle.
12. Wear a helmet when you bike on the road.
13. Don’t be a show off.
14. Call your grandmother, often.
15. Use most of your allowance to buy things for other people.
16. Learn to type.
17. Never be the first in your bus line.
18. Cry if it hurts.
19. Never talk badly about anyone.
20. Never buy your teachers perfume or a coffee mug.
21. Have your teacher over for lunch or dinner at least once during the
school year. (After I started teaching, I revised this to NEVER invite your
teacher over for lunch or dinner. If you really like them give them a gift
certificate to a favorite restaurant so they can have a leisurely dinner
themselves.)
22. Never talk to strangers.
23. Never go near parked cars.
24. Be alone in your room, not on the street.
25. Stop, look and listen before you cross the street.
26. Never flush anything except toilet paper and your body’s waste.
27. Go for comfort over style.
28. Keep your ears clean.
29. Never let a romantic interest come between friends.
30. Don’t lie.
31. It’s okay to color outside the lines.
32. Learn to shoot marbles, jump rope and play hopscotch.
33. Learn to play an instrument, well.
34. Learn to appreciate your parent’s music.
35. If your neighbors can hear your music when the doors and windows are
shut, it’s too loud!
36. Assume nothing.
37. Don’t be quick to judge.
38. Hear people out.
39. Unzip your pants before you try to put them on.
40. Leave the toilet seat down.
41. Don’t be sarcastic.
42. Never use the expression, “But everyone else is”, in an argument with
your parents.
43. Believe in Santa Claus.
44. Only ask Santa for 1 gift.
45. Get a pen pal.
46. Pray.
47. Get a magazine subscription, and then read it cover to cover.
48. Learn to bake something that doesn’t come out of a box.
49. Read The Giving Tree.
50. Don’t pick your nose in public.
51. Every once in a while, tell your siblings you love them.
52. Don’t start smoking.
53. Ask your parents and grandparents to tell you stories about their
childhood.
54. Never stick anything metal in a toaster.
55. After a shower or bath, dry off with a towel before putting on your
clothes.
56. Cover your mouth when you sneeze.
57. Wash your hands after going to the bathroom.
58. Flush
59. Share your lunch with someone who forgot theirs.
60. Feed your pets.
61. Don’t put dirty socks and underwear on a clean body.
62. Change your socks and underwear daily.
63. Don’t watch anything on television or at the movies you would feel
embarrassed watching with God.
64. Don’t abuse your phone privileges.
65. Never make your parents breakfast in bed. (Disastrous memories surface!)
66. Occasionally, clean something without being told to.
67. Don’t forget your prayers.
68. Never take drugs.
69. Never Take Drugs.
70. NEVER TAKE DRUGS.
71. Memorize your locker combination.
72. Don’t throw ice balls.
73. Never cancel plans to wait for a phone call.
74. Don’t change your plans with someone because something better came up.
75. Be courteous to adults.
76. Get to know your friends’ parents.
77. Don’t be rude.
78. Be curious. Question everything.
79. Always accept sincere apologies.
80. Don’t wear socks with holes in them.
81. Mend holes in socks.
82. Find something good in everyone.
83. There are many things in this world worth fighting for. Choose your
battles wisely.
84. Remind your parents to recycle. It’s your future they’re protecting.
85. Recycle and reuse.
86. Don’t be wasteful.
87. Set good examples for your parents.
88. Learn to dance.
89. Learn the difference between “I need” and “I want”.
90. Learn to control your wants.
91. Don’t ask your parents to buy you something you wouldn’t be willing to
spend your own money on.
92. Read something out loud daily.
93. Never take food for granted.
94. Never take your home for granted.
95. Never take your education for granted.
96. Never take your parents for granted.
97. Never take your country for granted.
98. Always sing the National Anthem even if you can’t hit the high notes.
99. Stand at attention and cover your heart for the Pledge Allegiance.
100. Have fun!
101. Memorize poems you love.
102. Keep hope in your heart.
103. Dare to dream for more than you thing possible, then make it happen.
104. Never run with scissors.
105. Don’t put your tongue on cold metal.
106. No matter how bad your day was, home will make it better.
107. Lie on your back, look up at the stars, and feel the earth turn.
108. Brush your teeth twice a day or three times a day if you ate something
disgusting.
109. Use toothpaste on your toothbrush.
110. Brush for at least 2 minutes.
111. Acknowledge who you are when you make phone calls. Don’t assume
everyone knows your voice.
112. If you take a message, give a message.
113. Never ease drop on another phone.
114. Return library books on time.
115. Return things you borrow in the same condition or better.
116. Only loan things that you’re willing to never see again.
117. Never use rubber cement to glue anything to your body. (A lesson my
youngest and I learned the hard way.)
118. Have friends of the opposite sex.
119. Tell your parents everything another adult tells you not to tell your
parents.
120. Make your bed daily.
121. Turn your socks right side out before throwing them into the laundry.
122. When given the chance, sleep in.
123. Every once in a while, get up before everyone else and enjoy the quiet
of the morning.
124. Take some time everyday to be alone with your thoughts.
125. Never call 900 numbers.
126. You don’t have to like all foods, but be adventurous enough to try
everything at least once.
127. Ask for help when you need it.
128. Don’t ask for help if you can do it yourself.
129. Offer to help when you can.
130. Don’t write anything in a note that you’re not willing to have the
whole school know about it.
131. Be generous with your hugs.
132. Stick up for those who can’t defend themselves.
133. Use public restrooms only when you absolutely have to. (Personal
repulsion!)
134. Never tell someone they deserved what they got, even if they did.
135. Use eating utensils in public.
136. When in doubt, talk to your parents.
137. Find out when your teacher’s birthday is and do something nice for him
or her.
138. Learn all three verses to Silent Night.
139. Don’t litter.
140. When possible, pick up litter and throw it away.
141. Take the advice of your parents over your peers.
142. Grow up but not away from your family.
143. Use deodorant if you need it.
144. Don’t squeeze pimples.
145. If you’re doing something you don’t want your parents to find out
about, chances are you shouldn’t be doing it.
146. Learn to see the insides of people, not just the outsides.
147. There’s no shame in failure if you tried your best.
148. Laugh a lot!
149. Learn to be a good listener.
150. Don’t say anything about someone you wouldn’t say in front of them.
151. Never get in a car with someone who’s been drinking.
152. Apply Vaseline to your eyebrows before blowing record breaking bubbles.
153. Don’t be in a hurry to grow up.
154. When filling a bathtub, you need to account for body mass.
155. Abhor violence.
156. On very hot days, lick your ice cream cones quickly.
157. Learn the difference between sympathy and empathy.
158. Be empathetic.
159. Eventually, your mother will look under your bed.
160. Be honest.
161. Don’t cheat.
162. Learn some really funny clean jokes.
163. Throw up in toilets.
164. Hold hands in a crowd.
165. When you’re out in a crowd, always have a place to meet in case you get
separated.
166. Remember where your mom parks the car at the mall.
167. Never try something if it's prefaced with "Does this taste bad to
you?"
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